Sunday, March 9, 2008

Jumper







"i wish you would step back from that ledge my friend,



you could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in..."



----- stephen jenkins (third eye blind).













lies?..what freakin' lies? can't we all suicidal folks just accept that truth is what scares us?



NO. don't answer. rhetorical question.



i've observed that the self proclaimed "victimised" people actually have lots of things to take into consideration before that final leap/sip/snort/ekta kapoor episode,etc. to make it a "perfect" one....and i ain't talkin' bout life threatening stuff like what the wind direction is, or what floor you're in,or what's the quality of bone china used for sipping, or what's the minimum payment on the credit card which you're using to sort the lines of coke....these people, quite simply put, "conundrum-ize"(ha ha, always wanted to use this word) themselves just at the last moment creating those "should-i-or-shouldn't-i" ideas in their heads.



THE SOLE PURPOSE OF THIS BLOG IS TO FLUSH THOSE IDEAS OFF YOUR MINDS SO THAT YOU HAVE A FULLY SATISFIED, WHOLESOME SUICIDAL EXPERIENCE.



So, what really stops us from making that "leap"? if you're expecting an answer, fuh-get-a-bout-it...my first name is not 'Agony' and i am SO not your 'aunt'. but then again, generosity while giving advice has always been my forte. if you're a working person, then i'm sure you are quite aware about the dreaded four letter word( starts with a 'b' and rhymes with 'moss')...and stop reading right here if you need a mentos to figure that out !!!...anyway - sorry i drifted away a bit there - coming back to that four letter word B-O-S-S, it really helps if you create such a situation for yourself where facing him/her would be worse than killing yourself. don't sweat your brain muscles too much on how to do that....just get totally slushed and leave a message on his answering machine telling him what you REALLY think about him..believe me, it works. saved me lots of valuable hours by not ever having to type resignation letters...surprisingly, everything just "happened" automatically or was "taken care of".


This option is also open to people who are dating the wrong person. except for few changes in the nomenclature, everything's the same.